别吹了 Knock it off!
别吹了 混蛋 Knock it off, asshole!
别吹了 听到没有 法兰克林 Knock it off! You hear me, Franklin?
你再继续吹 我就把它塞到你屁眼 You blow that horn again, I'm gonna screw it in your ass!
小心 Hey! Watch out!
片名 小公寓
法兰克林
我要说多少次 How many times do I gotta tell you?
那玩意真他妈的要命 你还不懂吗 That horn is a fuckin' menace. Don't you get it?
早安 欧先生 Good morning, Mr. Allspice.
你不能尊重一下别人吗 一下就好 Can't you maybe get a little respect? Just a little?
我猜你要去散步了 I assumed you'd left for your walk.
-你猜 -这能让我放松 -You assumed? -It relaxes me.
你何不去动物园听大象放屁就好 Why don't you go to the zoo and listen to an elephant fart?
那会让你放松啊 That would relax you, no?
里面很臭耶 You know, it stinks in there.
真是个白痴 What a fuckin' idiot.
我叫法兰克林 我并非一直住在这里 My name is Franklin. I haven't always lived here.
-我是说这个公寓 -借过 -In this apartment, I mean. -'Scuse me.
事实上不久以前 我的生活很不一样 In fact, not so long ago, my life was very different.
当时我和哥哥伯纳一起住 That was when I used to live with my brother, Bernard.
但后来他住进精神病院了 But then he took up residence in the psych center.
所以现在我独居 So now I live alone.
-还有一只狗 -哈啰 -Well, except for my dog. -Hello.
法兰克林 加州洛杉矶
每天伯纳都会送来一封信 Every day, Bernard sends me an envelope that contains
里面是一卷录音带 one cassette tape,
还有一些脚指甲 and an assortment of toenail clippings.
你该去死一死 You should kill yourself.
我不会把伯纳说的话 全当作福音 I don't take everything Bernard says as gospel,
因为萨吉曼诺医生诊断 他已经"疯了" because he was basically diagnosed "insane" by Dr. Sage Mennox, himself.
他是上过oprah秀的医生 And he's been on Oprah.
小弟 又是我 Hey, little bro! It's me again.
你老哥伯纳 又要告诉你一个真理 Big brother Bernard. Back for another installment of truth.
另一卷每日智慧语录 Another daily nugget of recorded wisdom.
我真的很兴奋 法兰克林 超兴奋 Very excited, Franklin. Really, really jazzed.
近来我不知怎么解释 我的脑子装满了 Lately, I don't know how to explain it. My head is just, it's filled
爆炸性的绝妙点子 with mind-blowing, fantastical shit.
听着 法兰克林 我昨晚听到上帝说话了 Listen, Franklin, I heard from God again last night.
上帝要我传个讯息给你 God wanted me to pass along a message to you.
他要我告诉你 "你被盯上了" He wanted me to tell you, "You're being watched. "
我了解你 法兰克林 不要惊慌 I know you, Franklin. Don't panic.
对 这可能是个威胁 Yeah, it might be a threat,
但也许只是个警告 but maybe it's just a warning.
知道吗 也许那只是 祂在看顾着你 You know? Maybe it's just, maybe it just means he's watching over you.
我要祂讲清楚 但我只是负责带话的 I asked him to clarify, but I'm just the delivery boy.
我是两个传声筒中间那条细线 I'm the string between the tin cans.
我得不到解释 I don't rate an explanation. Mmm-hmm.
但你知道我怎么对祂说吗 But you know what I told him?
我说上帝应该更可信一点 I said God would have a lot more credibility
不该老是找些疯子 替祂传话 if he didn't always pick crazy people to be his messengers.
法兰克林 理智根本是浪费 Franklin, sanity is wasted on the sane.
那是萧伯纳名言 That's George Bernard Shaw for you.
对了 那些脚指甲 Anyway, about the toenails.
别担心 我还有很多 Don't worry. There's plenty more where those came from.
我想这间公寓太小了 I think this apartment's too small for me.
也许我该离开这个地方 Maybe I should leave this place.
找个地方 那里的人也许懂我的音乐 Go someplace where people appreciate my music.
你觉得呢 奥利维先生 What do you think, Mr. Olivetti? Hmm?
汤米鲍斯 Hey, Tommy Balls.
-你在干嘛 -忙今天的计划 宝贝 -What are you doing? -Working on today's project, baby.
代办事项 自制水烟管 使用六个新字对话
几点了 What time is it?
10点32分 Uh, 10:32.
你想做爱吗 You wanna fuck?
那是昨天的计划 That was yesterday's project.
-你想睡醒哈一管大麻吗 -我昨晚说了 -You want a wake and bake? -I told you last night,
我在40天净身中 I'm in the middle of a 40-day cleanse.
我要摆脱所有的 I'm ridding myself of all my
疱疹 herpes.
所以... So...
疱疹 Herpes?
这间殿堂不容任何毒素进入 No toxins are allowed to enter this temple.
疱疹 Herpes.
马尔顿大楼
真希望我能和伯纳谈谈 I wish I could talk to Bernard.
他很聪明 He's smart.
他是会计师 在伟纳费许法律事务所工作 He was an accountant at that big law firm. Weiner and Fish.
他并非一直那么疯 He wasn't always crazy.
事实上他以前并不疯 In fact, he was almost always not crazy.
他也有许多女朋友 He had lots of girlfriends, too.
女孩都爱伯纳 Girls love Bernard.
这是淘汰圣女的方法 Hey, it's how you weed out the tight-asses.
太规矩的女人不打保龄球 See, uptight chicks refuse to bowl.
不打保龄球 就不会上床 They don't bowl, they don't roll.
懂我意思吗 Know what I mean?
懂我意思吗 You know what I mean?
好球 宝贝 她要上了 Nice roll, baby. She's up.
法兰奇 Frankie.
你懂我意思吗 You know what I mean?
-对 他懂 -对 -Yeah, he knows! -Oh, yeah.
我完全不懂伯纳的意思 I had no idea what Bernard meant.
-你在找什么 -剪刀 -What are you looking for? -Scissors.
-赞 -我以为你在做水烟管... -Sweet. -I thought you were building that bong...
大麻水烟管 Gravity bong.
一天不能只有一个目标 宝贝 我有多重目标 Never have just one goal for the day, baby. I'm multitasking.
你应该设定一个目标就好 You know, you should have just one goal.
因为如果太多 'Cause if you have a lot of them,
你肯定会搞砸一些的 you're just gonna fuck some of them up.
这是基本常识 That's just common sense.
不 大错特错 No, that's fallacious.
成功和射精的基本原理是一样的 Success is based on the same primal principle of ejaculation.
你射出几百万的精子只有一个卵子能受孕 懂吧 You shoot millions of sperm and only one egg gets fertilized, right?
你射得越多 就越有机会中标 The more you shoot, more chances something'll stick.
这是我的座右铭 It's like, my motto.
我的座右铭是性爱派对时 My motto is never go into an orgy,
屁股绝对不抬高 ass up.
-再见 汤米鲍斯 -再见 宝贝 -Bye, Tommy Balls. -Bye, babe.
该死 Shit.
奥利维先生 Mr. Olivetti,
我该拿你怎么办 what am I gonna do with you?
我想我可以把他丢出去 I guess I could toss him out the door.
不 No.
这不是最好的办法 That's not the best idea.
我可以埋了他 I could bury him.
我可以把他分尸 I suppose I could carve him into little pieces.
将尸块装进垃圾袋 Put the pieces in garbage bags
丢到城里的各个垃圾桶 and toss them into dumpsters all around the city.
天啊 Oh, God!
我不能做这种事 I can't do those things.
-完蛋了 -打个岔好吗 -It's hopeless. -May I interrupt?
我完蛋了 I'm hopeless.
奥利维一个人住 Olivetti lives alone.
等天黑后 就布置成自杀的样子 Wait till it gets dark, then make it look like a suicide.
这个主意不错 That's a pretty good idea.
阿福 我是你的邻居 汤米鲍斯 Hey, Fred, it's Tommy Balls, your neighbor.
老兄 那是什么味道 Dude, what's that smell?
我叫法兰克林 My name is Franklin.
好 你有没有空的塑胶瓶 Right. Hey, do you have one of those empty plastic pop bottles?
没有 No.
拜托 老兄 敦亲睦邻一下嘛 Come on, bro, help a brother out.
老兄 把锁炼移开 你把瓶子压扁了 Dude. Unhook the chain, man. You're compromising the bottle.
把门打开啦 Unlock the fucking door.
你们两个白痴在做什么 What are you two morons doing?
你少管闲事 死老头 You know, mind your own business, you inveterate douche.
你今天和奥利维先生讲过话吗 Have you talked to Mr. Olivetti today?
他应该过来帮我修水槽的 He was supposed to come by and fix my sink.
他不能去 我杀了他 他就躺在地板上 He can't. I killed him. He's lying dead on the floor.
我只是问问 你不必这么讨人厌 I was just asking. You don't gotta be a fucking dick about it.
你干嘛不穿件衣服 Why don't you put a fucking shirt on, too?
你可以闭嘴一分钟吗 Hey, listen, why don't you try shutting your yap for a minute?
你知道吗 死老头 你该去试试瑜伽 You know what, old man? You know you should try some yoga,
或40天净身之类的 or maybe a 40-day cleanse or something.
这样叉子比较容易刺进你喉咙 Just be a lot easier sticking this fork in your throat.
去你的 Whatever.
-死老头 -白痴一个 -Old motherfucker. -What a fuckin' idiot.
算你走运 今天我有事要忙 You're lucky I got shit to do today.
他干嘛对我这么不爽 I don't know why he's fucking with me.
他妈的死老头 Motherfucker.
他真是眼中钉 He's a pain in my ass.
谢谢你 杀手 Thank you, Killer.
杀手 说说你是怎么关始你的拳击生涯的 Listen, could you tell me, Killer, how your fabulous boxing career started?
我小时候在纽约开始练拳击的 Well, I started boxing as a kid in my neighborhood in New York.
有一天我在家里 我妈叫我去倒垃圾 One day I was sitting at home, my mother asked me to take the garbage out.
所以我一拳打她的嘴 So I punched her in the mouth.
那时我们没什么钱 'Cause we didn't have a lot of money at that time,
我妈只好一直当我的陪练员 we had to keep my mother on as a sparring partner.
但效果不大好 她一直从轮椅上摔下来 That didn't work out too good, though. She kept falling out of the wheelchair.
钥匙 Oh, the keys.
我做得到 你可以的 I can do it. You can do it.
群众都在欢呼 The crowd was out there, they were yelling.
我左右开弓 再来几拳... I threw a left and a right. A left and a right. A couple of...
从不打烊
已打烊
他可能在柜台后打手枪 He's probably jacking off behind the counter.
快点开门啦 Open the goddamn door!
真会蘑菇啊 老兄 Yeah, take your sweet-ass time, dude.
汤米在后面吗 Is Tommy back there?
他明天才有班 He's on tomorrow.
我需要香烟 I need some smokes.
不能卖了 前几天警察上门了 No can do. Had the cops in here the other day.
真的 Really?
你确定吗 Are you sure about that?
西梦 Simone.
那也许能换瓶啤酒 That might get you a sip off my beer,
但香烟一包6.75元 but for $6.75 a pack,
我要摸到才算 I'm gonna have to cop a feel.
你的香烟卖那么贵 又不是我的错 It's not my fault your cigarettes are overpriced.
大麻的话我就同意 Maybe for a joint.
好 Okay.
但我一定要好好捏一捏 But it's gonna have to be a good squeeze.
真好 Nice.
亚帝 Hey, Artie.
摸客喜汽水呢 Where's the Moxie?
一直放在老位子 底层最后一格 Same place it always is. Last case, bottom shelf.
谢了 亚帝 Thanks, Artie.
-才两秒钟 -只能这样了 -That was like two seconds. -Well, it's as good as it gets.
我需要火柴 And I need matches.
亚帝 我找到了 Hey, Artie. Found 'em.
很好 Great.
谢了 亚帝 Thanks, Artie.
我认得你 Hey, I know you.
你住在对街的公寓 You live across the building from me.
我要回家了 你要陪我走吗 I'm going home now. You wanna walk with me?
好 Okay.
我看到你在窗口 拿着大望远镜 I see you by your window with your big binoculars.
偷窥先生 Mr. Peepers.
没关系 我妈不知道 It's okay, my mom doesn't know.
我不在乎 这又不像你在我前面自慰 And I don't care. It's not like you're jerking off in front of me.
以你这样的老家伙来说 还不算太坏 And you're not totally disgusting for an old guy.
真的 Really?
谢谢 Thank you.
你几岁 50了 What are you, like, 50?
32 很接近了 32. Close.
我和我朋友安珀 我们要去赌城 My friend Amber and me? We're going to Vegas.
我们要去当舞者 We're gonna be dancers.
赌城 Vegas?
舞者 Dancers.
我们在网路和一个男的聊天 We've been chatting with this one guy online.
他的朋友开了几家夜店 肯定会很棒的 His buddy owns a few clubs. It's gonna be pretty cool.
我等不及自己赚钱了 I can't wait to have my own money.
今晚午夜你要做什么 偷窥先生 Hey, what are you doing at midnight tonight, Mr. Peepers?
-我没有...-今晚你走运了 -Uh, I don't... -Okay, tonight is gonna be your lucky night.
我想今晚我会准备让你毕生难忘的表演 I think tonight I'm gonna give you a show that you're never gonna forget.
午夜 Midnight.
别迟到了 Don't you be late.
我无法看着他的脸 I can't look at that face.
祝你今日愉快 Have a nice day.
前面的照明应该从傍晚亮到黎明的 These front lights are supposed to be on from dusk till dawn!
我猜灯坏掉了 I think it's broken!
什么 What?
我说灯坏掉了 I said, the light, I think it's broken!
我想灯坏掉了 灯坏了 I think they're broken! I think they're broken.
怎么可能坏掉 你这白痴 我刚刚才开的 Well, it can't be broken, you idiot! I just turned the light on!
那大概是你修好了 做得好 Oh, then I guess you fixed them, so nice job!
你在干什么 What are you doing?
打包 Uh... Packing.
打包 是要去旅行吗 Packing? Like, trip packing? Like that?
对 我... Yeah. I'm...
因为我要搬家 'Cause I'm moving. I'm moving
搬去瑞士 to Switzerland.
瑞士 Switzerland?
咕咕钟王国 太好了 Land of the cuckoo clock. That's perfect.
我要搬去瑞士 这有什么好笑的 I don't think it's funny that I would move to Switzerland.
完全不好笑 很多人都会这样 There's nothing funny about that. People do it.
你尽管搬就是 拜托你搬 By all means, you move. Please, just move.
搬去仙国 中国都行 I mean, go to Bum-Fuck, China, if you like.
我不会去那里 Well, I'm not gonna go there.
不管你决定搬去哪里 快点搬就是了 Right, well, wherever you decide to go, just do it in a hurry.
我会问问奥利维... And I'm gonna ask, maybe, Olivetti to...
请他找个新房客 不要像你那么爱音乐的 You know, rent to somebody less musically inclined than you.
你可以问他啊 他的尸体就在地上 Oh, you can ask him now. He's lying dead on the ground.
什么 What?
没什么 Nothing.
好 祝你在瑞典生活愉快 行吧 All right, well, listen. You have a great time in Sweden, all right?
是瑞士 Switzerland.
-还不都一样 -才不一样 -Same shit. -No, it's not the same shit.
完全不同的国家 懂吗 It's like two different shits, okay?
记得让灯开着 好吗 Well, look, make sure these lights stay on, all right?
奥利维先生看起来 和我妈死时完全不一样 Mr. Olivetti didn't look at all like my mother when she passed.
我妈妈看起来很安详 My mother looked peaceful.
好像她的痛苦突然消失了 Like all her pain had suddenly just vanished.
妈妈去世之前 她要伯纳保证会照顾我 Before Mom died, she made Bernard promise to take care of me.
他做的第一件事 就是把保龄球砸在我脚上 The first thing he did was to drop a bowling ball on my foot.
伯纳的球打断我脚上的13根骨头 Bernard's ball broke 13 bones in my foot.
我大脚趾的指甲再也长不回来 The nail on my big toe never grew back.
我从此长不出头发 And I lost all my hair, forever.
我认为他是想保护我 I think he was trying to protect me,
因为我们不只是兄弟 还是最好的朋友 because we aren't just brothers. We're best friends.
以前我们形影不离 We used to go everywhere together.
直到有一天 情况开始改变了 Until one day, when things started to change.
我可以买这个吗 Can I get this?
你想变得 头脑聪明 体格强健 You want to become mentally fit and physically strong.
当然可以 老弟 Yeah, sure, pal.
我要听听这家伙怎么说 I just wanna see what this guy has to say.
他就是这时闯入的 That was when he came into the picture.
思考... Minding the...
-萨吉曼诺医生 -把你的大脑当成肌肉 -Dr. Sage Mennox. -Think of your brain as a muscle
那也需要锻炼 伸展 that needs to be toned and flexed.
同样的原则 也适用在锻炼你的智能 Now, the same principle applies to exercising your sanity.
-看看他如何掌控全场 -利用我的纯熟方法 -Look at how he works the room. -Using my proven methods,
你可以大大减低 脑子遭到攻击的机会 you vastly reduce your chance of a brain attack.
锻练真正的大脑肌 Achieving true Brain Brawn
就像自我启发心智的终极奥运 is nothing less than the ultimate Olympics of mental self-discovery.
他很棒吧 He's good, isn't he?
谢谢 谢谢 Thank you. Thank you.
从那一天起 事情就不一样了 From that day, things were never the same again.
他开始一直找"答案" He was always searching for "the answer. "
曼诺医生的书中提到 我的脑袋塞了许多 You know, Dr. Mennox's books say that my brain is clogged with
情绪胆固醇 emotional cholesterol.
我必须锻炼更强的思考 I need to exercise stronger thoughts.
对 Yeah.
总之他说答案就在书中 He said that the answer's in the books anyway.
那些都是畅销书 所以... And they are best-sellers, so, you know...
我觉得他似乎想告诉我什么 I think he was trying to tell me something.
这实在有趣 他说疯子看起来 You know, this is funny. He said that crazy people,
和正常人没什么两样 they don't look any different than normal people.
他们不会 You know, they don't
穿着睡衣在街上走 他们就像你和我一样 walk around on the streets wearing their pajamas. They look like you and me.
他们在我们的工作场合 在我们屋子里 And they're at our job and in our home
在我们家人中 and in our family.
我最近头痛 I get these headaches.
一直头痛不止 就好像 And they just don't go away. It's like, you know,
就好像吸了一大口思乐冰 痛感一直存在 like you've taken a big slug off a Slurpee and it just stays with me.
你还好吧 Are you okay?
我很好 I'm fine.
我没事 I'm okay.
我要你知道 我... I want you to know that I'm...
我会照顾你的 I'm looking out for you.
但我看得出来 事情不太对 But I could tell something was wrong.
我了解我失去最好的朋友 And I realized, I was losing my best friend.
好 All right.
抱歉我杀了你爸爸 Sorry I killed your daddy.
"敬启者..." "To whom it may concern... "
亲爱的残酷世界... Dear cruel world...
绿洲汽车旅馆
贺曼警官
天啊 Oh, God.
华纳 Walnut.
博特 我是李奇·贺曼警官 Hey, Burt. It's Detective Rich Holman.
李奇 Hey, Rich.
你好吗 How ya doin'?
抱歉吵醒你 博特 I'm sorry if I woke you, Burt.
我们在西亚当区 We're over here in West Adams.
员警表示邻居报案听到枪声 Uniforms responded to a neighbor's report of a shot fired.
他们在社区垃圾桶找到一具焦黑尸体 They found a crispy critter in a garage on the property,
所以我们要找火灾鉴识员 so we're calling in the county fire investigator.
-看来今晚就是你 -在哪里 -Looks like tonight, that's you. -And what's your 20?
哈佛街1444号 是一间旅馆 哈巴狗的哈... 1444 Harvard Boulevard. That's Hotel, Alpha, Romeo...
我知道 我知道了 I got it. I got it, I got it.
博特 你一定会喜欢这个的 Hey, Burt, you're gonna love this scene.
怎么说 What do you mean?
他还在冒烟 你懂我意思吧 Well, he's still smoking, if you know what I mean.
你让我兴奋了 You're giving me a boner, you realize that?
好 我马上过去 没必要就别乱碰现场 All right, I'm on my way. And don't touch nothing if you don't have to.
摸我老二行吧 What about my pecker?
从你发现有老二 你的手就没放开过 You haven't taken your hand off that since you discovered it.
你没瞎还真奇怪 It's a wonder you're not blind.
如果吵醒你太太 替我向她道歉 Hey, tell your wife that I'm sorry if I woke her.
好 我马上说 Yeah, I'll tell her right now.
亲爱的 是李奇·贺曼 他说很抱歉吵醒你 Hey, sweetheart, it's Rich Holman. He said to say he's sorry if he woke you.
没事 睡得很熟 这女人在锯木厂也睡得着 Nothing, man. Flatline. This woman could sleep in a fucking sawmill.
待会见 博特 I'll see you in a few, Burt.
好 马上到 Yeah, I'll be there.
该上工了 Let's go to work.
天啊 快点 快一点 Oh, my gosh, come on! Come on! Hurry.
好戏上场 Ah! Showtime.
天啊 好耶 Oh, God. Okay.
我的天 Oh, my.
瑞士一定就像这样 This must be what Switzerland is like.
天啊 Oh, my.
美女 Oh, pretty lady.
色鬼
我必须把奥利维的车子藏起来 I gotta hide Olivetti's truck.
这家伙有几把钥匙啊 How many keys does the guy got?
这是什么玩意 What is this thing?
白人小子 你在干什么 Hey! Hey, white boy! What you doing, man?
那是一辆好车 你懂吗 That's a nice truck right there, you know what I mean?
你这样操 离合器会烧坏的 You're gonna burn out the clutch if you keep on doing that
到时你就后悔莫及了 懂我意思吗 and then you're gonna be damn sorry. You understand what I'm saying?
我只想开车 它不动 I just want it to go. It won't go.
你有入档吗 Well, is it in gear or what?
我想那是...我不知道 I think it was in... I don't know.
你的卡车哪里来的 你根本不会开 How the hell you get a truck, man,
对 你可以帮我吗 Yeah, can you help me please, though?
拜托 Please?
-好啦 -所以... -Yeah. All right. -So...
-你的脚要踩离合器 -踩离合器 -You're gonna put your foot on the clutch. -Foot on the clutch.
要一直踩到底 And you're going to put it all the way down to the floor.
懂吗 那是在车子的左边... All right? That's on the left side of the vehicle...
"祝你有愉快的一天" "Have a nice day. "
博特 Hey, Burt.
很高兴看到你 Good to see ya.
好 我们的调查是这样 Okay, here's what we're looking at.
证据似乎显示 The physical evidence wants to suggest that the subject
这家伙拿锐器自刺胸口 stabbed himself in the chest.
是螺丝起子 平头的 With a screwdriver. It's a flat-head.
好 Okay.
他以胶带将手固定在握柄上 标准级的 He had taped his hand to the handle with electrical tape. Standard grade.
我看得出来 谢谢 I can see that. Thank you.
这样的结果还不满意 Unsatisfied with that result,
死者还以这把手枪轰掉半张脸 the subject then blew off half his face using this shotgun.
我们找你来 是因为致命一击 We called you because the coup de grace
是他以助燃剂自焚 was he ignited himself with an accelerant.
松节油 Turpentine.
他思虑周到 还用这个灭火器灭火 He thought better of it and extinguished the fire using this canister.
剩半张脸 想得倒快 Quick thinking with half a face.
对 看来他还戴了 Yes. And it appears he has
一副特大号的假阴毛 an oversized merkin melted into his
覆盖在私处 private region.
假阴毛 Merkin?
就是私处的假发 It's a pubic wig.
真的假的 Really?
这玩意通常都戴在裤子外面 Are they normally worn on the outside of the pants?
显然他还留下遗书呢 Apparently he left a suicide note.
"烂人们 注意听好" "Attention, fuckwads. "
"你们都去吃屎吧" "You can all suck it. "
死者还闯入自己的车库 The subject also broke into his own garage.
玻璃是往内破碎的 最简单的常理 The glass was shattered inwards. It's a classic B and E.
对 显而易见 Oh, it's a classic.
-还有一件事 -什么 -There's one more thing. -What's that?
他少了一个脚趾 He's missing a toe.
真的 Really?
自杀是吗 Suicide, huh?
现场证据 就想让我们这样以为 That's what the physical evidence wants to suggest.
自杀 Suicide.
对了 你太太好吗 博特 By the way, how's the wife, Burt?
她很好 谢谢 她好极了 She's fine, thank you. She's perfect, actually.
-李奇 -是 -Hey, Rich? -Yeah.
他有车子吗 Did he have a vehicle?
车道上没有车子 I mean, there's nothing in the driveway.
有 奥利维有辆福特小货车 Yeah, we got Olivetti registered with a Ford pick-up truck.
我们已经发布全面通缉 We just put out an APB.
他还拥有一栋公寓 离这里不远 He also owns an apartment building not too far from here.
要我追查这条线索吗 You want me to follow up on that lead?
哪条线索 What lead?
假阴毛那个 The one about the merkin.
好 好主意 警官 Yes. Good idea, Officer.
我要你追查假阴毛的事 I want you to work the merkin angle.
去当地的阴毛用品店 Go to the local merkin store,
看看有谁在过去72小时内买过一副假阴毛 check out anybody who's bought a merkin in the last 72 hours.
调查每一种尺寸 大中小都要 Check every size, small, medium, large.
各种不同的毛色 褐的 金的 草莓金 大红色 All different kinds of hair, brunette, blonde, strawberry blonde, redhead.
不同的材质 人的体毛 牦牛毛 洋娃娃的 Different kinds of hair, human hair, yak hair, doll hair.
天啊 Oh, boy.
博特 你的看法呢 So, Burt, what do you think?
找到那辆货车 就能找到犯罪的人 Locate that Ford pick-up truck, we have the perpetrator.
对 Yeah.
这是怎么回事啊 What the fuck do we have here?
老兄 车子有问题啊 Yo, you got a little car trouble, dawg?
你开车还真可怕 That's some remarkably shitty-ass driving, yo.
老兄 你从哪里来的 Hey, man, where you coming from?
那里 Uh, just over there.
哪里也不是 真的 Nowhere, really.
看看他啊 Man, look at him, man.
他真像一颗爆米花 He looks like a piece of fucking popcorn.
你是我见过最白的家伙了 Yo, you are the whitest motherfucker I've seen in my life!
我是白人啊 I am white!
是真的 It's true!
妈的 老兄 Oh, shit! Oh, shit. Hey, man.
听着 小白 Look. Look, dawg!
我知道 我知道 I know! I know!
我想摸摸看 我想摸摸看 I wanna touch it! I wanna touch it!
挺好摸的 很像你妹妹的屁股 Hey, man, that's nice. Hey, that's like your sister's ass, man.
-去你的 混蛋 -什么 -Man, fuck you, motherfucker! -What?
她才13岁 Man, she's only 13!
你给我闭嘴 Hey, man, shut the fuck up!
你跟着笑屁啊 Hey, what the fuck you laughing at, dawg?
别嘲笑他人 Don't fucking laugh at that shit.
妈的 我喜欢这只表 Damn, I like that watch, dawg.
对 挺酷的玩意 Yeah, it's kinda ironic and shit.
我哥哥伯纳给我的表 My brother Bernard gave me that watch.
-我们就拿走了 -不行 -Man, let's take that shit, dawg. -No!
什么 What?
没错 That's right.
会痛吗 Did that hurt?
-老兄 你修理他了 -痛吗 是吗 -Yo, man. Yo, kick his ass, man. -Did that hurt? Yeah?
这样感觉如何 怎样啊 How'd that feel? Huh?
对 我身怀武术 Yeah, I get all Bruce Lee!
肯定痛死了 Oh, that's gotta hurt!
怎样啊 Yeah, what's up, bitch?
你说什么 What'd you say?
-把手表给我 -不要 -Man, gimme that watch! -No!
闭嘴 怎样 Shut up, man! What?
对 就是这样 Yeah, that's right.
-老兄 快走了 -我来开 -Hey, man, come on, hurry up. -I'm driving.
不 你不能开 你没有驾照 No, you ain't driving. You don't got a license, dawg.
你想变得头脑聪明 Do you want to be mentally fit,
体格强健 and physically strong? Like me?
现在打电话 只要24.99元
保证见效
了解大脑就像肌肉 才能锻练真正的大脑肌 Achieving true Brain Brawn begins when you
思想就像肌肉 understand that your brain is a muscle
那也需要锻炼 that needs to be toned.
不纯的思想 各种错误思考 Impure thoughts, all forms of wrong thinking,
让你的大脑变慢 软弱无力 makes your brain slow, soft, lazy.
-来了 -好 -One second. -Okay.
嗨 妈 Hi, Mom.
你来干什么 现在是早上11点32分 What are you doing here? It's 11:32 in the morning.
我要你陪我上教堂 现在就去 I want you to come to church with me right now.
你喝醉了 Are you drunk?
没有 No.
随便啦 Whatever.
和我去 Come with me.
之后我们一起吃午餐 我带你去查克汉堡店 We'll have lunch afterwards. I'll take you to Chuck E. Cheese's.
我今天要上班 I gotta work today.
楼下那家便利商店 What, down at the convenience store?
这样你就租得起这间狗窝 买那些毒品 So you can rent this dump and buy your drugs?
狗窝和毒品并非免费的 妈 Well, drugs and dumps aren't free, Mom.
你问题颇大的 汤玛斯 You have a problem, Thomas.
真的 我有问题 Really? I have a problem?
我也有... So did I...
你老是这样说我 As you never get tired of telling me.
不过耶稣帮助我找到方向 But Jesus has helped me find my way.
-耶稣 耶稣不是也说...-这不关耶稣的事 -Oh, Jesus. Wasn't it Jesus who said... -Leave Jesus out of this!
我去过高山 I have been to the mountain.
所有涡流的中心 The center of all vortexes!
你一来 我就觉得我该用锡箔纸包衬内裤 When you come over, I feel like I should line my underpants with tin foil,
因为你真是太疯狂了 because you're fucking crazy.
事实上你是酒鬼时 还没那么虚假 The fact is, though, you were way less perfidious as a drunk
好过你现在当基督徒 than you are now as a Christian.
对 Yes.
我知道 I know that.
我是糟糕的母亲 I was a terrible mother.
现在你这样过日子 让我很自责 And now I blame myself for the way you're living now.
我很好 I am fine.
和你一起嗑药的那些男孩 Those boys you smoke dope with,
他们不是你的朋友 汤玛斯 they're not your friends, Thomas.
和你上床的那些娼妇 她们不爱你 Those whores you commune with, they don't love you.
没人像我这么关心你 Nobody cares about you like I do.
你是我儿子 You're my son.
你是我的一部分 You are a part of me.
你从我的阴道出来的 You came out of my hoo-ha.
妈 我知道你这样说 是想强调母子关系 Mom, I know you're trying to connect with me when you say stuff like that,
但这实在太恶心了 but it's fucking disgusting.
听着 老妈 Listen, Mom,
我能问你一个问题吗 can I ask you a question?
你尽管问 You can ask me anything.
我能借20元吗 Can I borrow 20 bucks?
不行 No.
我的妈呀 那是什么 Great Gatsby! What was that?
只是隔壁的胖宅男 又在吹他的阿尔卑斯山号 It's just the fat hermit next door blowing his fucking alphorn.
真是疯人院 This is an asylum!
怪胎 Freak!
...让你的心力运行发挥最大的心智潜力 ...your mind to function at its maximum potential of mental fitness,
快参加我的研习 三天就让你改变一生 come down to my life-changing, three-day seminar.
学习我的原则 你也可以用大脑肌过生活 Learn my principles and you, too, can attack your life with true Brain Brawn!
你的衣服呢 Where are your clothes?
"亚柏·奥利维" "Albert Olivetti"
"哈佛街1444号..." "of 1444 Harvard Boulevard... "
"福特货车失踪..." "Missing Ford pick-up truck... "
"验尸报告..." "Autopsy report... "
"死因可疑" "Death ruled suspicious. "
"没有 "No
收 envelope
到 from
伯纳的信" Bernard. "
伯纳 Bernard!
他没有一天漏寄的 He never misses a day.
-除了星期天例外 -当然 -Except for Sundays. -Of course.
还有假日 And holidays.
当然 我特别说了是平常有送信的日子 Yes, of course. I'm speaking specifically of regular mail days.
他从未漏掉一天 He's never missed a regular mail day.
我知道 I know.
你觉得有问题 Well, what do you think's wrong?
有点不对劲 Something. Something is wrong.
将近一年以来 这是他第一天没寄信 This is the first day he's missed in almost a year.
你要怎么办 Well, what are you gonna do about it?
法兰克林 你要怎么做 Franklin, what are you gonna do?
法兰克林 法兰克林 法兰克林 Franklin, Franklin, Franklin. Franklin!
去精神病院 Go to the psych center.
-不行 他特别交待过 -去他的 -I can't. He left specific instructions. -Fuck that.
-伯纳特别强调 -好 那就别去 -Bernard was emphatic. -Fine. Don't go.
你不觉得我该去 You don't think I should?
-不 -我想去可以开车去 -No. -I can drive there if I want to.
我想怎样就怎样 I can do what I want.
别发疯了 别去 法兰克林 Don't be crazy! Don't go! Franklin!
我要去 I'm going.
我是... I'm...
我要探视一位病人 I'm here to visit a resident.
-什么名字 -法兰克林 -What's the name? -Franklin.
-姓呢 -法兰克林 -First name? -Franklin.
好 那名字呢 Okay, then what's the last name?
法兰克林 Oh, Franklin.
"法兰克林·法兰克林" "Franklin Franklin" ?
法兰克林·法兰克林 Franklin Franklin.
先生 这里没有 法兰克林·法兰克林这个病人 Look, sir, we do not have a resident here named Franklin Franklin.
有的话我一定记得 I know this off the top of my head.
不 我是法兰克林·法兰克林 Oh, no, no, I'm Franklin Franklin.
那你要见谁 Then who are you here to see?
法兰克林 Oh, Franklin.
另一个法兰克林·法兰克林 There's another Franklin Franklin?
伯纳·法兰克林 他是我哥哥 Bernard Franklin. He's my brother.
好 等一下 Right. One moment.
法兰克林先生 Mr. Franklin?
我是贝克太太 Mrs. Baker.
法兰克林先生 介意我叫你法兰克林吗 Mr. Franklin, do you mind if I call you Franklin?
不介意 No.
请坐 Please have a seat.
法兰克林 我恐怕有些坏消息 Franklin, I'm afraid that I have some very difficult news.
伯纳死了 Bernard's dead.
对 谁通知你的 Yes. Who informed you of this?
我要求见我哥哥 Well, I asked to see my brother,
他们却带我来单独房间 they show me into a private room,
你又说有坏消息... you tell me you have difficult news, I mean...
很遗憾你失去亲人 法兰克林 Well, I'm very sorry for your loss, Franklin,
但你也知道 伯纳病得很重 but as you know, Bernard was very sick.
他是因为脑瘤导致脑溢血死亡的 He expired from a hemorrhage as a result of his brain tumor.
脑瘤 Brain tumor?
对 他的脑 Yes, his brain.
你不知道 You didn't know?
伯纳到这里没多久 就诊断出 Bernard was diagnosed very soon after he arrived here,
他的脑瘤无法开刀 and the tumor was inoperable.
我以为你们两个谈过 I assumed that you two spoke.
没有 No.
我没有... I didn't...
我是说 所以他没有... I mean, so he wasn't...
他... He...
为何没有人告诉我 他生病了 Why didn't somebody tell me he was sick?
我很抱歉 他没有把这件事告诉你 I'm very sorry that he didn't share this information with you
但伯纳是自愿住在这里的 but Bernard was a voluntary resident here,
法律保障病人的隐私... and the laws that protect patient confidentiality...
自愿 Voluntary?
这里不是监狱 法兰克林 This is not a prison, Franklin.
这里是医院 It's a hospital.
很少有病人是强制入院的 Very few of our patients are committed by the state.
你是说他随时可以离开这里 You mean he could have left here any time he wanted?
对 Yes.
他每天都去散步 直到脑瘤让他无法行动 He took a walk every day until the tumor impaired his mobility.
他去哪里散步 Where did he go?
只是附近走走吧 Just around the neighborhood, I would suppose.
许多病人喜欢 Many of our residents like to
去看电影 图书馆 或是打保龄球 go to the movies or the library or the bowling alley.
保龄球 Bowling alley?
对 我们有个很棒的球道 Yes, we have a very nice one just around the corner.
法兰克林 你必须签署一些文件 Franklin, I have some paperwork that I need you to sign, if you don't mind.
这一份和这一份 This one right here and this one.
伯纳还要我把这个给你 And also, Bernard wanted me to make sure that I gave you this.
我要见伯纳 I want to see Bernard.
我要见我哥哥 I want to see my brother.
当然 Absolutely.
脑瘤 A brain tumor.
和妈妈一样 Just like Mom.
她说这是"脑的癌症" "Cancer of the noggin," she called it.
记得吗 Remember?
你一直瞒着我 伯纳 You kept some secrets, Bernard.
你猜怎么着 Well, guess what?
你不是唯一藏着秘密的人 You're not the only one with secrets.
我杀了我的房东 I killed my landlord.
他来要房租 He wanted the rent.
房租到期了 我又没交 It was overdue, like it always is, and,
我没有钱 I didn't have it.
开门 Open up.
-天啊 -我们必须谈一谈 -Oh, my! -We need to talk.
奥利维先生 我不知道你今天要来 Mr. Olivetti, I wasn't expecting you today.
把门打开 Open up the door.
这到底是什么 你喜欢这个啊 What the hell is going on? You like this? Huh?
这个 你喜欢这张照片 This? You like this picture?
对 非常喜欢 Yes, very much, actually.
-有多喜欢 -我超喜欢的 -How much you like it? -I like it a whole lot.
事实上那是我哥哥伯纳给我的 In fact, that was given to me by my brother, Bernard.
现在呢 我不在乎 Did he, now? Yeah, I don't care.
欧先生又在抱怨 Mr. Allspice has been complaining again.
他说你一直在吹这个鬼东西 He says you've been blowing this thing all hours.
-没有一直吹 是早上7点 -你知道他想怎样吗 -Not all hours. I blow it at 7:00 a. m. -You know what he wants to do?
他想把这根喇叭 插进你的屁眼 He wants to shove this horn right up your ass.
我该告诉他 你喜欢这一味吗 Should I tell him you might like it or what?
妈的 Fuck.
你想和我玩吗 是吗 You wanna play a game? Huh?
我没心情玩游戏 I'm not in the mood of a playing a game.
你已经两个没缴房租了 And you are two months behind with your rent.
你有钱吗 Do you have the money?
我没有钱 I never have it.
那就照老规矩 你知道的 Okay, then you know the routine.
抹点芥末酱上去 Put some mustard on it.
假装它是酸黄瓜 Pretend it's a pickle.
那就比较容易吃了 There you have it.
还在等什么 小蛋糕 What's the hold up, cupcake?
你知道我做的时候心里在想什么吗 伯纳 Do you know what I think about when I'm doing that, Bernard?
我在想瑞士 I think about Switzerland.
我想像 I imagine
我真的在吹 I'm really blowing
我威猛的阿尔卑斯山号角 my mighty alphorn.
我们必须谈一谈 We need to talk.
嘴巴有东西不能讲话 快 Not with your mouth full. Come on.
我说 I said,
我们必须谈一谈 we need to talk.
奥利维先生 Mr. Olivetti?
你还好吧 Are you all right?
我的手臂不能动了 I cannot move my arms,
我的腿 my legs.
-你完蛋了 -这是意外 -You are so fucked. -It was an accident.
你会因此入狱的 You're going to jail for this.
我一定告死你 I'll make sure of it.
我很想打烂他的脸 I was gonna smash his face in!
但他突然停止呼吸 He just stopped breathing.
要不然我就会杀了他 I would've killed him, though.
我想杀他 I was willing.
这才是重点 对吧 And that's what matters, right?
这次你留给我什么 老哥 What have you left me this time, brother?
另一个谜团 Another mystery?
抱歉 Excuse me.
妈的 Fuck!
放轻松 Hey. Easy, easy, easy.
搞屁啊 老兄 What the fuck, dude?
你住在这里 You live here?
-不是我做的 -我没说你做了什么 -I ain't done nothing. -I didn't say that you did.
-你叫什么名字 -汤米 -What's your name? -Tommy.
你是谁 警察 What are you, a cop?
不是 我是火灾调查员 所以你可以放心 No, no. I'm a fire investigator, so you can relax.
我只想问你几个关于房东亚柏·奥利维的问题 I just want to ask you a few questions about your landlord, Albert Olivetti.
他应该来帮我修理水槽的 He's supposed to come by and fix my sink.
我没看到他 I haven't seen him.
你要去找个水管工了 Well, I would hire a plumber if I were you
他昨晚死于火灾 because he died in a fire last night.
-他还好吧 -不好 他死了 -Is he okay? -No, he's dead.
老兄 Dude.
那真惨 That's fucked up.
这栋公寓还有哪些邻居 Who are your neighbors in this building?
有个讨厌的老家伙住在244号 他是欧先生 There's an old bellicose fart up in 244 named Mr. Allspice.
我隔壁那个240号的家伙 该怎么说 他是个疯子 The guy next door to me, in 240, what can I say? He's a fucking whack job.
真的 怎么说 Really? How so?
他一直在吹那种大号角 Well, he's always blowing on this humongous horn.
你知道咳嗽药那个广告 You know the ones from the cough drop commercials?
他老是穿着白色内裤晃来晃去 He's always parading around in his tighty-whiteys.
他和房东...我不知道 Him and the landlord, man... I don't know.
你不知道什么 You don't know what?
他搬来之后 总觉得他和房东之间怪怪的 Ever since he moved in, he's had something weird going on with the landlord.
每次收房租 奥利维总是先去他的公寓 You know, come rent time, his apartment's always Olivetti's first stop,
你懂我意思吧 if you know what I mean.
不 我不懂你的意思 你直说好吗 No, I don't know what you mean. So why don't you enlighten me?
算了 Forget it.
我什么都不知道 I don't know nothing.
什么都没看到 And I haven't seen nothing.
一点都没有 Nothing at all?
-我知道一件事 -什么 -I know one thing. -What's that?
奥利维是个混蛋 少了他世界会更美好 Olivetti was an asshole and the world's a better place without him.
我要去工作了 谈完了吗 Look, I gotta go to work. Are we good?
奥利维死了以后 这栋建筑物会怎么样 So what's gonna happen with this building now that Olivetti's dead?
这个烂地方 This shithole?
市政府会炸掉 标准程序 The city will blow it up. Standard procedure.
好吧 All right.
大家真爱说笑 Everybody's a fucking comedian.
去你妈的 Motherfucker.
你好吗 Hey, how you doing?
烟和松节油 你闻到这个吗 Smoke and turpentine? Is that what you smell?
那是酸黄瓜汁 That's pickle juice.
家
去你的 Fuck you.
假阴毛 Merkins.
博特 查到什么了 Hey, Burt, what do you got?
验尸有结果了吗 Hey. Anything on the autopsy yet?
还没有 Not yet.
-福特货车呢 -没消息 -Ford truck? -No. Nothing yet.
好吧 我需要一张搜索令 All right, listen, I need a search warrant at the Marlton property.
马尔顿大楼 240房 Apartment 240.
房客是法兰克林·法兰克林 The tenant is a Franklin Franklin.
再说一次 博特 我听到两次法兰克林 Say that again, Burt. I got Franklin twice.
对 他的名字就是法兰克林·法兰克林 我正看他的信件 Yeah, that's his name. Franklin Franklin. I'm reading it right off his mail.
你在那里做什么 博特 What do you got going over there, Burt?
我晚点再告诉你细节 我必须离开这里了 I'll call you later with the details. I gotta get the hell outta here.
是吗 你在哪里 Yeah? Where are you?
-在他公寓 -天啊 -In the apartment. -Jesus Christ.
法兰克林
先玩我
做得好 法兰克林 你解开我的小谜语了 Good job, Franklin. You solved my little riddle.
我以你为荣 I'm very proud of you.
可惜我也快死了 Unfortunately, I'm also very dead.
这是好消息 也是坏消息 Which is good news and bad news.
坏处是 以后你就是自己一个人了 On the downside, you are now alone in the world.
我知道你已经 独自生活了一段时间 I know it's probably felt like that for a while, but,
现在正式生效 now it's official.
往好的方面看 On the bright side,
现在我死了 我终于能告诉你实话 now that I'm dead, I can finally tell you the truth.
你记得几年前 You remember, years ago
我在肯塔基州替酒厂做帐 when I did that audit for the distillery down in Kentucky?
他们说波旁酒每年的熟成 都会挥发掉百分之二 They say when bourbon ages, about two percent of it evaporates each year.
他们说这是"天使持分" They call it "the angel's share. "
既然伟纳费许公司老是超收客户的钱 And since Weiner and Fish always overbill our clients anyway,
我想我也可以从中污点钱 我称之为"伯纳持分" I figured I could skim the excess and call it "the Bernard share. "
钱不多 但也不少了 Not a lot, but not a little.
而且累积迅速 And it added up fast.
总共有80万了 To the tune of over 800 grand.
听着 Look.
我本来要告诉你的 I would've told you about it,
但我关始头痛 情绪也不定 but then came the headaches, and the mood swings.
我无法控制 我说的话 做的事 I had no control over what I might do or say.
它在哪里 Where is it?
曼诺医生 Dr. Mennox!
它在哪里 Where is it?
它在哪里 Where is it? Huh?
它在哪里 Where is it?
你说答案就在书中 我读了 You said the answer was in your books. I read your books,
每一本都读了 I read every one of them.
我什么也没找到 里面没有 告诉我在哪里 I didn't find anything. There's nothing there. Tell me where it is.
-什么答案 -你知道我在说什么 -The answer to what? -You know what I'm talking about!
你知道我在说的答案 告诉我在哪里 You know what answer I'm talking about! Just tell me where it is.
我在找答案 你说它就在书中的 I'm looking for the answer. You said it was in there!
这个人显然疯了 This man is clearly insane!
走吧 Come on.
该死 干 Shit! Fuck!
所以我自己住进精神医院 So I checked myself into the psych center.
打开信封 Open the envelope.
里面有一万元 There's 10,000 bucks in there.
而且还有很多 And there's plenty more where that came from.
还有贴了照片的护照 There's also a passport with a picture.
生日快乐 Happy birthday,
宾州费城 马力欧·卡东 Mario Cardone of Philadelphia, PA.
对了 不管你怎么做 别丢了那张小纸条 Oh, and whatever you do, don't lose that little slip of paper.
那是你在瑞士银行新帐号的密码 That's the password sequence to your new Swiss bank account.
我从伟纳费许公司偷钱 因为他们罪有应得 I stole the money from Weiner and Fish, because they didn't deserve it.
但是法兰克林 我也无福花用这笔钱 But Franklin, I wasn't destined to enjoy it, either.
你知道吗 You know
摩西要多优秀才能带领以色列人离开旷野 how Moses was good enough to lead the Israelites out of the wilderness,
但他不适合进入应许之地 but he wasn't fit to enter the promised land?
你就像古代的希伯来人 法兰克林 Well, you're like the ancient Hebrews, Franklin,
现在我要带领你 走出洛杉矶的束缚 and now I have led you out of the bondage that is L.A.
听着 法兰克林 我是说... Listen, Frank. I mean...
宾州费城的马力欧·卡东先生 Mr. Mario Cardone of Philadelphia, PA,
这些钱 这个机会 this money, this opportunity,
这是我给你的临别礼物 this is my parting gift to you.
我实现了对妈妈的承诺 I'm fulfilling my promise to Mom
也关了所有帐户 and closing all accounts.
重新开始吧 小弟 Make a fresh start, little brother.
我不再拖住你了 I'm not holding you back anymore.
去找你的幸福 Go find your happiness.
哈啰 Hello.
我不认识你 I don't know you.
现在认识了 我是火灾调查员博特·华纳 Well, now you do. I'm Burt Walnut. I'm a fire investigator.
-你是欧先生 -你要干嘛 -You Mr. Allspice? -What do you want?
我想问几个 关于你房东的问题 I'd like to ask you a few questions about your landlord,
亚柏·奥利维 可以吧 Albert Olivetti, if you don't mind.
进来吧 Come on.
我闻到松节油的味道 Do I smell turpentine?
你很行 Wow. You're really good.
你真是一流的调查员 You're some fucking great investigator.
我用来清刷子的 See, I clean my brushes with it.
警察找亚柏有什么事 Look, what do the cops want with Albert?
我不是警察 是火灾调查员 I'm not a cop. I'm a fire investigator.
显然这里没失火吧 你要干嘛 Well, apparently there's no fire here, so what is it that you want?
我... Well, I...
很遗憾通知你 I'm sorry to inform you that
亚柏·奥利维昨晚死在家中 因为火灾 Albert Olivetti died in a fire last night at his home.
他还好吧 Is he all right?
不好 他死了 No. He's dead.
你们是朋友吗 Were you friends?
他太太过世的时间 和我太太差不多... His wife died about the same time mine did. And...
所以我们彼此认识 So we knew each other
13年了 13 years.
这本来该是暂时的 You know, this was all supposed to be temporary.
我太太死后 我把房子卖了 我想去哪里都可以 You know, I sold the house when my wife died. I could've gone anywhere.
佛罗里达 夏威夷 You know, Florida, Hawaii.
哪里都行 Wherever.
我却来这里 I came here.
然后我才发现 我在这间该死的公寓 Then I realize I've been in this same fucking apartment
住了13年 for 13 years.
我每天做同样的事 I do the same thing every day.
我走到街角的中国餐厅 I take this walk down to the corner to the Chinese restaurant.
再走回公寓 天天都吃鸡肉炒饭 I come back here and I eat my chicken fried rice every day.
就是这间烂公寓 In this shitbox.
你到底想问什么 Hey, what the fuck did you want anyway?
对不起 Well... I'm sorry.
你在躲谁 太太还是情妇 Who are you avoiding? Your wife or your mistress?
我问你在躲谁 太太还是情妇 I said, who are you avoiding? Your wife or your mistress?
谁 Huh?
太太 Wife.
她做了什么 或者她没做什么 Something she did or something she didn't do?
她和别人做了什么 Someone she did.
-别人 这问题严重 -是很严重 -Someone? That's a big one. -Yeah, that is a big one.
是"一次而已"的那种事吗 Well, was it a "one and done" kinda deal? One of them?
她发誓是的 She swears.
如果是我 我会原谅她 Personally, I'd forgive her.
-真的 -听着 -Really? -Look,
你不再是年轻小伙子了 you're not a young buck anymore.
自己独居不是什么惬意事 Living alone, as you can tell, is not terrific.
-你最后一次看见他是何时 -谁 -When was the last time you saw him? -Saw who?
奥利维 Olivetti.
我没有真的看见他 但我知道他在里面 因为 I didn't see him exactly, but I knew he was in there because,
里面很吵 乒乒乓乓的 好像狼人在摔角 lot of noise, they were banging around like a couple wolverines wrestling.
然后是昨晚 But then last night, I see that,
那个白痴在打包 他说他要搬到瑞典之类的 that moron, he's packing. He said he's moving to Sweden or something.
你是指瑞士吧 Would you mean Switzerland?
瑞典 瑞士 Sweden, Switzerland,
就是把象鼻当乐器的怪国家 wherever they think a giant elephant tusk is a musical instrument.
我不知道 你是调查员 你去查 I don't know. Look, you're the investigator, you investigate.
好 Okay.
那是什么意思 What the fuck does it mean, anyway?
听着 你帮了大忙 All right, listen, you've been a big help.
-听你胡扯咧 -谢谢你 -It's all bullshit. -So, thank you.
谢了 老兄 Thanks, dude.
汤米 Tommy.
西梦 Hey, Simone.
记得今天是什么日子吗 Do you remember what day it is today?
今天 Today.
我 Me.
我要离开了 I'm leaving.
没错 对 Oh, right. Yeah.
季节又到了 'Tis that season again.
你们这对旅行姊妹淘打算去赌城 The Sisterhood of the Traveling Panties. You and your buddy, headed to Vegas.
祝你好运 西梦 Good luck with that, Simone.
你不相信我走进第一家舞厅就会被录用 You don't believe I'd get hired by the first dance club I walk into?
首先 你要讲对名称 First of all, unless you call it what it really is,
那叫脱衣俱乐部 也叫牛肉场 a strip club, AKA titty bar,
也许你还没准备好光着屁股在老变态身上磨蹭 maybe you're not ready to grind your bare ass against some old pervert yet.
我不是说你不行 我只是说如果你这样做 You know, I'm not saying you can't. I'm just saying if you do,
就成了"那个女孩" you're gonna be "that girl. "
-什么女孩 -"那个女孩" What girl? "That girl. "
-什么女孩 -那个女孩的妈妈15岁就生下她 What girl? That girl whose mom had her at 15
还不让女儿约会 深怕自己30岁不到就当了奶奶 and won't let her date because she doesn't want to be a grandma at 30.
那个女孩利用性引诱每个男孩 That girl who uses sex on all the boys
好像那是万能搂控器 like her pussy's some universal remote,
然后以为我们都是混蛋 我们只想上她而已 and then thinks we're assholes when all we wanna do is bang her.
每家脱衣俱乐部 都有十个这种辣妹 You know, there's 10 of these chicks in every strip club
就像大量生产的芭比娃娃 like mass-produced Barbie dolls.
只是她们可没有马里布的豪宅 Except for they don't come with a Malibu Dream House.
她们只有针孔和性病 They come with stretch marks and STDs.
那是你的目标吗 西梦 Is that your goal, Simone?
你算什么 心理医生 What are you, a psychiatrist?
你只是个天杀的毒虫 汤米 You're a fucking pothead, Tommy!
对 只差五个学分就修完心理学的毒虫 Yeah, a pothead who's five credits away from his degree in psychology.
-你何不念完呢 -因为我不想成为"那家伙" -Why don't you finish? -Because I don't wanna be "that guy. "
至少我有计划 你又有什么目标 At least I have a plan. What is your big goal?
我只看到一个在便利商店工作的嗑药毒虫 All I see is a stoner who works in a convenience store.
是基于便利的社区 我是行动中心 In a convenience-based society. I am at the center of the action.
我有目标 我每天都会完成一些 I have goals and I accomplish something every day.
你想做什么 对着东方生意人抖你的奶 What are you going to do? Twirl your titties for some Asian businessman?
真好的计划 Good plan.
去死啦 汤米 Fuck you, Tommy.
-烂人 -少来了 西梦 -Jerk off. -Come on, Simone.
我只是逗逗你 I'm just jagging you.
去死啦 Fuck you.
-华纳 -法医给我报告了 -Walnut. -Coroner gave me a preliminary.
肯定很有意思 说吧 Oh, this should be interesting. Shoot.
报告指出 死者下巴底下有伤口 Report says massive trauma delivered beneath victim's chin
我想足以切断他的脖子了 enough to snap his neck, I guess,
后脑勺也有伤口 and to the rear of the victim's skull.
死亡大概是发现尸体的36小时前 Puts time of death around 36 hours before discovery.
医学鉴识的结果 Medical examiner's conclusion,
死者遭钝器所伤才送命 homicide by blunt force trauma.
我问你 这个钝器伤口 Let me ask you something. This trauma,
可能像是号角之类的吗 could it be caused by something like a horn?
号角 像喇叭那种 A horn? Like a trumpet?
对 路易阿姆斯壮杀了他 Yeah. Louis Armstrong killed him.
路易阿姆斯壮 Louis Armstrong?
第一个上月球的人 The first guy on the moon?
你是指法国号吗 What, do you mean like a French horn?
不 是号角 很长的号角 No. Like a horn. Like a long horn.
就像穿短裤的家伙 在阿尔卑斯山吹的那种 Like the kind the guys with the short pants play in the Alps.
在山上那种 You know, in the mountains.
卖咳嗽药那种 号角 They use them to sell cough drops. A horn.
咳嗽药 你到底在说什么啊 Cough drops? What the fuck are you talking about?
你到底在说什么 What the fuck are you guys talking about?
算了 Never mind.
-我有礼物给你 -她叫什么名字 -I got a present for you. -What's her name?
搜索令 Search and seizure.
哈啰 宝贝 Hello, sweetheart.
哪一间 Which one is it?
-240 -240 -240. -240.
对 从这里就闻得到 Yeah, you can smell it from here.
泰格烟酒食品行
来吧 老兄 Come on, man.
你好 S'up?
你好吗 What's up?
给我比森香烟 硬盒装的 Let me get those Bilson Menthols. Hard pack.
好 All right.
专心点 我们走 Come on, focus, man. Let's go.
把钱通通放在柜台上 快点 Put all the money on the counter, man! Do it now!
好 好 老兄... Yeah, yeah! Dude...
快点照办 别耍我 Just do it, man! Don't fuck with me!
别惹他 混蛋 Yeah, don't fuck with him! Shit!
干 Fuck!
快拿钱 死家伙 钱啦 Get the money, fuckface! The money!
钱啦 死人 快点拿钱 干 The money, fuckface! Grab the fucking money! Fuck!
给我一分钟 老兄 Just give me a second to capitulate, man!
全拿来 收银机拉开 全拿来 All of it, man! Pull out the tray, shithead! All of it!
把收银机倒光 笨蛋 我们要闪了 Lift up the tray, shithead! Come on, man, we ain't fucking around.
死人啊 我们走 快点 钱啦 Fuckface, let's go! Come on, man, the money!
去你的 干 Fuckface, shit, fuck!
干 干 干 Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!
-后面有人吗 -没有 -Is someone back there? -No.
汤米 Tommy!
你没事的 You're okay.
很抱歉我取笑你 I'm sorry I made fun of you.
-闭嘴好吗 -不管你的梦想是什么 都很好 -Shut up, okay? -Whatever your dream is, that's okay.
汤米 Tommy,
你闭嘴啦 you shut up about that.
好吗 别讲话 你只管呼吸 Okay? You shut up. You just have to breathe.
他为何要开枪打我 Why'd he have to shoot me?
-继续呼吸 -我要我的妈妈 -Just breathe. -I want my mama.
我知道 I know.
救护车马上来了 好吗 Help's on the way, okay?
没事的 It's okay.
你会没事的 You're gonna be okay.
别说抱歉 Don't be sorry.
猜猜是谁 Oh! Guess who?
是偷情表兄 It's the cousin fucker.
家
对 她和我表哥有一腿 你能相信吗 Yep. She's fucking my own cousin. Do you believe this?
你可能会这样做 因为你是狗 You probably do because you're a dog.
狗都是这样 自家表亲也上 That's what dogs do, they fuck their own cousins.
所以才是狗 狗不知道 That's why they're dogs. They don't know.
你在嗅别只狗屁股时 会问 "你是我表兄吗" Did you ever ask when you're sniffing around an ass, "Hey, are you my cousin?"
你不会 你就是上了 You don't. You just fuck away.
你是可爱的小家伙 You're a cute little guy.
要来一点吗 来吧 别让我一个人喝 You want some? Come on, don't make me drink alone.
来吧 Come on.
它还好吧 How'd he do?
正在大小号 Number one and number two.
我好嫉妒 I'm so fucking jealous.
-好乖的狗 -不管他主人是谁 -That's a good boy. -Whoever he is.
博特 你还好吗 You all right, Burt?
好 Yeah.
好孩子 Good boy.
什么样的人会遗弃自己的狗 What kind of man abandons his dog?
好孩子 你要回家对吧 Okay. That's a good boy. You wanna go home, huh?
好 我知道了 Okay. Yeah, I got it.
哪来这么多警车 发生什么事了 What's with all the police cars in the neighborhood? What's going on?
街角的便利商店发生枪击案 There was a shooting at that convenience store down the block.
到院前死亡 DOA.
死者是这家伙的邻居 Victim was this guy's neighbor.
汤玛斯鲍特利 A Thomas Balisteri.
我下午才和他说过话 I spoke to him this afternoon.
那个电话响个不停 天啊 That goddamn phone has been ringing non-stop. Jesus.
他是老人 该查看一下 He's an old-timer. We should check on him.
-过来 小子 -对 什么 -Come here, boy. -Yeah. What?
-我不要这个 -接好了 -I don't want this. -You got him?
对 等一下 Yeah. Hold on.
欧先生 Mr. Allspice?
我是博特·华纳 It's Burt Walnut.
欧先生 Mr. Allspice?
博特 Hey, Burt.
欧先生 Mr. Allspice?
他死了 He's dead.
看来他吃光了 公寓内的所有药丸 It looks like he decided to take every pill in the apartment.
这罐是治香港脚的 This one's for foot fungus.
对 他挺可怜的 Yeah, he was a sad guy.
他还好吗 He all right?
不好 他死了 No. He's dead.
我们有失踪货车的线索 我们要走了 Hey, we got a lead on that missing vehicle. We gotta go.
-狗呢 -我把它塞到另一个房间 -Where's the dog? -I stuck him in the other room.
你们会通报这个吧 我等救护车来 Hey, you guys will call this in, right? I'll stay here for the EMT.
-走吧 -那只狗尿在我鞋子上 -Come on. -The fucking dog pissed on my shoe.
我叫龌龊哈利 Like my name's Dirty Harry.
老兄 Yo, man.
惨了 老兄 Oh, shit, man!
好的 All right.
好了吗 马上下去 You got it? Be down in a minute.
丹 Hey, Dan?
什么 Yeah?
我有事问你 Let me ask you something.
你明知道他已经死了 Why do you put so much effort into saving a life
为何还花那么多精神急救 that you know is already over?
你为何要这么做 I mean, why do you do that?
在还没结束之前 一切都不算迟 I mean, nothing's over until it's over.
对 但他已经结束 这家伙死了 Yeah, but this was over. This guy was dead.
不...我是指我的看法... Nah... I mean, the way I see it...
除非我放弃 否则不算结束 It ain't over until I quit.
我要试过一切方法 一切都没用之后 才会放弃 If I try everything I got and nothing works, then all right.
那时才叫结束 Then it's over.
但是... But...
你总要试一试 You gotta try.
你懂我意思吧 You know what I mean?
是 我懂 Yeah, I do.
好 上路了 All right, lock it up.
再见 See ya.
放轻松 博特 Take it easy, Burt.
真是鬼扯 太扯了 It's all bullshit. It's all bullshit.
全是鬼扯 It's all bullshit.
这可不是 That's not bullshit.
华纳 Walnut.
-你是对的 -什么是对的 -You were right. -About what?
我们找到奥利维的福特货车 猜猜怎么着 We located Olivetti's Ford truck and guess what?
我们找到凶手了 两个小白痴 We definitely have found our perpetrators. Couple of real mooks.
等等 别挂 Wait, hold on.
和便利商店的枪击案一样的手枪子弹 Same caliber as the slugs found in the convenience store homicide.
车子登记在亚柏·奥利维名下 The vehicle is registered to Albert Olivetti.
很好 Great.
也许现在可以放弃假阴毛的线索了 Maybe now you can stand down on that merkin angle, huh?
了解 Check.
就是他们了 博特 我们抓到他们开着房东的货车 So these are the guys, Burt. We've got 'em driving the landlord's truck,
用他的武器犯下了超商枪击案 and they used his weapon to commit the convenience store homicide.
破得漂亮 我再回电告诉你细节 It's a slam dunk. I'll call you back with the details.
你们两个白痴麻烦大了 You two fuckholes are in a shitload of trouble.
-喂 -喂 欧先生 -Hello? -Hello, Mr. Allspice.
我是法兰克林·法兰克林 你的邻居 This is Franklin Franklin, your neighbor.
法兰克林 你好 Franklin. Hello, Franklin.
等等 你不是欧先生 Wait. You're not Mr. Allspice.
不是 我叫博特 我是欧先生的朋友 No, my name is Burt. I'm a friend of Mr. Allspice.
朋友 欧先生有朋友 A friend? Allspice has a friend?
对 我...我来拜访他 Yeah, I... I came by to visit him.
他出去帮我买鸡肉炒饭 He went out to get some chicken fried rice for the two of us.
做个改变 You know, for a change.
可以帮我留个话吗 Can you relay a message to him?
我希望他可以帮我照顾狗 I would really appreciate it if he would look after my dog.
告诉他我的门没锁 Tell him my door is unlocked.
-狗食在...-法兰克林 何不告诉我 -His food is on the... -Franklin, why don't you tell me
你在哪里 我可以把狗带过去 where you are, and I can bring your dog to you?
它的食物在地上 它一天吃两餐 His food is on the floor and he eats twice a day.
我知道欧先生痛恨我的阿尔卑斯号 Look, I know Mr. Allspice really hates my alphorn,
但我想他应该不恨我的狗... but I don't think he has anything against my dog...
法兰克林 我真的很想要你的联络资料 Franklin, I would really like to get some contact information.
万一狗狗发生什么事呢 I mean, what if something happens to the dog?
你会想知道吧 You'd like to know, wouldn't you?
法兰克林 Franklin?
-法兰克林 -我在 -Franklin? -I'm here.
抱歉由我告诉你坏消息 I'm sorry to be the one to bring you some bad news,
但是你的房东奥利维先生 but your landlord, Mr. Olivetti,
被杀害了 was murdered.
可是 法兰克林 But, Franklin,
他们抓到两个凶手了 they caught the two guys who killed him.
两个庞克少年 Two young punks
开着奥利维的货车 driving around in Olivetti's truck.
他们以为这样逃得掉 你能想像吗 They thought that they could get away with it. Can you imagine that?
我听说奥利维是个烂人 And from what I hear, this Olivetti was a bad guy.
有人会觉得他罪有应得 Some might say that he had it coming to him.
你了解我在说什么吗 法兰克林 Do you understand what I'm saying to you, Franklin?
我要挂电话了 I'm hanging up now.
法兰克林 不要 等等 我有最后一个问题 Franklin, no, Franklin. Wait, I have one last question.
我在听 I'm here.
狗叫什么名字 What's the dog's name?
伯纳 Bernard.
它叫伯纳 His name is Bernard.
好好享受阿尔卑斯山 Enjoy the Alps.
法兰克林 Franklin,
我们在怕什么 what are we so scared of?
你一生只有一次机会 You only get one shot at this life.
不能重来 There are no do-overs.
时间一浪费就没了 Time wasted is time lost.
过去就像鬼魂 The past is a ghost,
未来才是梦 the future a dream.
只是现在 There is only right now.
我们必须原谅彼此 法兰克林 We need to forgive each other, Franklin.
原谅 然后继续前进 因为我们是如此不完美 Forgive and keep moving forward, because we're all so ridiculously imperfect.
我们必须找到一个叫家的地方 And we need to find a place we call home.
一个有爱和安全感的地方 A place where we know we're loved and we feel safe.
我现在看得很清楚 I see it all so clearly now.
不管你是住在小公寓 It doesn't matter if you live in a small apartment
还是山上的大房子 or some big mansion on a hill.
不管你是住在精神病院 It doesn't matter if you live in a mental institution
还是圣十字湖的阳光海岸 or on some sunny beach in St. Croix.
一切都在你心中 It's all in your mind.
生活中的每一刻 都靠你去创造 Every moment of your life is what you make it.
痛苦 Pain,
爱 love,
恐惧 fear,
幸福 happiness.
你选择去感受这些 You choose to feel each of them.
所以选择快乐吧 法兰克林 So choose to be happy, Franklin.
选择快乐 Choose to be happy.
因为幸福是一种心理状态 Because happiness is a state of mind.
答案
来吧 伯纳 Come on, Bernard.
好 来吧 All right, come on.
我有一只狗 I got a dog.